Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize
