I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
