I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Randomize
