Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize
