I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
His hands were made for my vagina.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
