you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Randomize
