He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
