Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize
