32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
I woke up under a house in Key West
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
