are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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