Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize