fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Randomize
