Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
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