Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
