I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Randomize
