oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize
