So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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