the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Randomize
