we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
the day after is always just damage control
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
