is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
