So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
