at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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