Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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