I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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