no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
