He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
