just come out here and I will go home with you...
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
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