i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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