I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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