their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
