Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Randomize
