I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Randomize
