guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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