Whatcha textin bout Willis?
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Randomize
