she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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