I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
