VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Randomize
