I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
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