ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Can I color on your dick again?
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
