im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
We don't watch enough power rangers
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