no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
