no. you can't hotbox the world.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
The feeling are messing with the penis
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Randomize
