I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
