you would pick up someone in the library
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
