Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
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