I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
Randomize
