is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize