You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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