Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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