white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
This is classic penis vs brain.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Randomize