Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
